There are a number of terms and expressions that are frequently used in Visible Child circles that I find are frequently misunderstood or misapplied. With this new year, it seemed as good a time as any to offer a few clarifications and tips. And I just really like that word “explications” so I threw that … Clarifications & Explications – Part 1
If you woke up tomorrow and everything around you was purple—the air, the trees, even people—you would not have an option to see and respond to things the way you did before. For me, this is what a “lens shift” or a “frame shift” in parenting is. It is not just a conscious decision to … What is a Lens Shift, Anyway?
We, as human beings, are inseparable from our culture. The culture in which we are raised, the culture of our ancestry, the culture of our families, the culture of our institutions. There are many definitions, many meanings. As adults, we can and do make conscious choices to deviate, of course. For example, perhaps the culture … Finding the Right Question
Most prominent among the questions parents ask is a certain “brand” or theme that looks something like this: “How do I deal with my own anger?” “How can I be a calmer, more consistent, parent?” “I know I’m supposed to stay calm and not get flustered, but I always end up yelling–how do I fix … Shame: A Roadblock to Respectful Parenting
I struggled a bit over the title of this post. Limit Setting for People Pleasers? Well, that’s a whole lot of us, isn’t it. Not quite right. The Wimp’s Guide to Limit Setting? I mean, name-calling, even in playfulness, is the clickbait way of the internet, after all, right? No, best to leave that word … The Reticent Parent’s Guide to Limit Setting
We have to talk. This parenting thing, it’s a tough job. Don’t we know it. Some say that having a child is like walking around for the rest of your life with your heart outside your body. Yeah, kinda. One thing I know for sure. None of us get through it without pain and struggle. … Parenting The Child You Have
Guest post by Julie of Amplify Autism My daughter skips along through the sand, little legs moving in an awkward and beautiful ballet. Her arms swing widely at her sides, fingers splayed, hands slightly aloft. As her toes take their first plunge into the water’s edge, she squeals happily and kicks her feet in hard, sending … My Daughter is a Garden
Parenting is hard enough. We don’t need to be keeping secrets from one another. But we do. If you spend any time in parenting groups–online or in real life–you know that parents are worried. And overwhelmed. And wanting to know what is normal and whether we are “doing it right.” These anxieties may be at … The Secrets We Keep: What Parents Don’t Tell Other Parents
We have a new rule in our house these days: Everything is my fault. No matter what. If the conditioner bottle in the shower is empty, it’s my fault. If the egg yolk breaks (she hates that) when it is going into the pan, it’s my fault. If it gets to be 3:00 in the … It’s All My Fault. All of it.
My business, Visible Child, has a tag line that means a great deal to me, and is at the heart of the work and writing that I do every day: “As a matter of fact, they DO come with instructions.” As you may have figured out, it is in reference to the omnipresent comment expressed … Authenticity: The Hardest Truth
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