communication

There’s No Trying In Limit Setting

Today, on one of the facebook groups that I run, a member asked what feels to me like the quintessential limit-setting and respectful discipline question.  It was a long and complex question with many parts, especially as it contained examples, which I had specifically requested (it is so much easier to answer discipline questions when There’s No Trying In Limit Setting

It’s All My Fault. All of it.

We have a new rule in our house these days: Everything is my fault. No matter what. If the conditioner bottle in the shower is empty, it’s my fault. If the egg yolk breaks (she hates that) when it is going into the pan, it’s my fault. If it gets to be 3:00 in the It’s All My Fault. All of it.

Authenticity: The Hardest Truth

My business, Visible Child, has a tag line that means a great deal to me, and is at the heart of the work and writing that I do every day: “As a matter of fact, they DO come with instructions.” As you may have figured out, it is in reference to the omnipresent comment expressed Authenticity: The Hardest Truth

Choices: Why? When?

I’ve encountered a lot of misunderstandings about offering children choices recently. I’m hoping a rundown might help.  Today, focusing on why and when choices are a good idea. 1.  Why offer choices?  One of the most critical and valuable pieces of advice we can receive in today’s social media-saturated world is “Don’t Read The Comments.”  Choices: Why? When?

The Problem With Parenting Books

Oh, and parenting websites.  Those too. If you’ve dug around my blog at all, you’ve probably seen quite a few references to my philosophy of “Question Everything.”  And if you follow my work, you know that I run a number of parenting websites (via facebook, mostly).  And if you’ve followed me on Facebook, you probably The Problem With Parenting Books

Consequences & How We Misuse Them

As most of you who read this blog know, I’m a stickler for words and definitions.  One of the places in which this comes up most frequently is in regard to “consequences.”  It’s not that I like being annoying, it’s that I just can’t help myself from commenting on this.  Not to skirt responsibility or Consequences & How We Misuse Them

Why Punishments Don’t Work

You’ve tried it all. Taking away toys.  Taking away fun stuff to do.   Canceling playdates or a trip to the aquarium. Time-outs.  Yelling.  Spanking.  Isolation.  Lectures. How’s that working for you?  Have the behaviors gone away?  Do you now have calm, pleasant, cooperative children?  Or does the need for these strategies continue? To be fair, Why Punishments Don’t Work

A Slice of RIE – “Sportscasting”

Whether or not you feel the the infant/toddler parenting philosophy known as RIE (Resources for Infant Educaring)®  is a good fit for you, there are small but powerful lessons to be learned by those who do take on this sometimes challenging but deeply rewarding work.  Perhaps the most life-changing of all is the ever-increasing data, A Slice of RIE – “Sportscasting”